Are you using someone as a drug? | Mel Robbins #Shorts

Using another person to modulate one's own difficult emotions, often for a quick dopamine hit, can turn relationships into a form of 'drug' dependency.

• Anxiety and dopamine drive the reflexive need for external assurance.

• Using others to regulate one's emotions turns relationships into a dependency.

• Technology exacerbates this 'drugified' behavior, enabling instant emotional gratification.

There is a strong connection between anxiety, dopamine, and the reflexive need to seek assurance from others during stressful times. While emotional intimacy is healthy, a dependency forms when one uses another person as a 'drug' to regulate their own emotions. This behavior has become more insidious with technology, enabling instant gratification for emotional distress.

Emotional Dependency

• 00:00:00 Anxiety and dopamine are linked to the tendency to seek quick assurance from others when feeling stressed or emotional. This 'reflexive need' can lead to using another person as a 'drug' to modulate difficult emotions, crossing the line from mutual love to dependency. It is crucial to distinguish between genuine connection and using someone for personal emotional regulation.

Technology's Role

• 00:01:27 Modern technology has made this 'drugified' reliance on others more destructive, enabling instant contact and gratification. Unlike 20 years ago when reaching out required effort, devices now allow immediate access, making it easier to use others to alleviate discomfort. It is suggested to pause and reassure oneself during distress instead of immediately contacting a person, allowing for a 'dopamine reset'.