The podcast recounts the experience of Nick Irving, a former US Army Ranger, during his third deployment to Afghanistan. He describes his time in Helmand Province, known as the most dangerous place in the country at that time. Irving reflects on the moral implications of killing, his struggles with guilt and remorse, and the lasting impacts of his service on his life.
Deployment to Afghanistan
• 00:00:04 Nick Irving describes his third deployment to Afghanistan as a 'bad' experience, where he was tasked with killing Taliban fighters and clearing the area for the Marines. He emphasizes the difficulty in discerning civilians from terrorists and the gray areas of conflict.
Helmand Province
• 00:06:03 Helmand Province was considered the deadliest place in Afghanistan in 2009 due to its high concentration of Taliban fighters and opium trade, which funded the insurgents. Irving recounts his experiences of intense firefights and the relentless nature of the enemy, who seemed fearless of death.
High Value Target
• 00:47:25 Irving was tasked with participating in a five-day operation to capture a high-value target. The mission involved a joint effort with Marines and the deployment of reconnaissance teams. Irving describes the grueling nature of the mission, the lack of sleep, and the intense firefights they encountered.
The Sniper
• 01:03:36 Irving and his team were pinned down by a skilled Chinese sniper who seemed to know their every move. The experience instilled fear and a sense of being hunted. Irving describes the close calls and the constant fear of death that permeated the situation.
Rules of Engagement
• 01:07:56 The strict rules of engagement under President Obama made it difficult to get bombs dropped on enemy positions, despite the intense firefights and imminent threat to Irving and his team. This highlights the political constraints and considerations that impact military operations.
Cop's Death
• 01:41:50 Irving recounts the death of his teammate, Benjamin 'Cop' Ennis, who was shot by the sniper and died despite the efforts of the medic. The event impacted Irving deeply and he struggled with guilt and remorse, questioning the purpose of his actions and the sacrifices made.
Pimon's Fall
• 01:48:27 Irving describes a bizarre incident where his teammate, Pimon, fell into a 75-foot deep hole in the ground. The event highlights the unpredictable nature of combat and the risks faced by soldiers. Pimon survived, but the incident further emphasizes the toll that war takes on both physically and mentally.
Leaving the Military
• 02:02:05 After his third deployment to Afghanistan, Irving made the decision to leave the Army. He had reached a point where he felt he had done enough and was mentally exhausted from the experience. He describes feeling tired and wanting to go home.
Private Contracting
• 02:04:02 Irving transitioned into private contracting, initially as a basic private security guard and eventually a designated marksman. He describes the feeling of independence and the lack of micromanagement he experienced in the private sector compared to the military.
Mental Health
• 02:14:22 Irving discusses the impact of his war experience on his mental health. The trauma from his deployments and the emotional burden of killing had time to settle in after he left the military. He details his struggles with alcohol abuse and the challenges of adjusting to civilian life.
The Purpose of War
• 02:24:32 As a result of the Taliban's takeover of Afghanistan, Irving reflects on the purpose of his service and the effectiveness of US military intervention in the region. He questions the strategic decisions made and the lasting impacts of the war on both the US and Afghanistan.